Nerdy Kitten Pants

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I recently got a Samsung S5 phone. I had never had a smartphone before, but it seemed pretty self explanatory. In fact, there was very little in the way of an instruction manual. When I got my last phone (the dumb kind with buttons and stuff) it had an instruction BOOK.
For the first few days I had it all down. I was downloading apps, texting like nobody’s business, and generally making good use of the phone.
It all went to hell the first time my phone rang.
I suddenly became super aware of the fact that I had NO IDEA how to answer my new phone.
I frantically started pushing things to no avail. Anyone watching must have though I looked like a crazy person poking my phone and yelling hello over and over again.
By accident I drew my finger across the button and saw that it started making the answer circle get bigger. This was progress. I hurried to make the circle as big I could like some strange katamari. Thank the Samsung Gods it worked! I managed to fumble my way into answering my phone before the person on the other end of the line hung up. Thus ended my spectacular adventure in answering my phone.

I recently got a Samsung S5 phone. I had never had a smartphone before, but it seemed pretty self explanatory. In fact, there was very little in the way of an instruction manual. When I got my last phone (the dumb kind with buttons and stuff) it had an instruction BOOK.

For the first few days I had it all down. I was downloading apps, texting like nobody’s business, and generally making good use of the phone.

It all went to hell the first time my phone rang.

I suddenly became super aware of the fact that I had NO IDEA how to answer my new phone.

I frantically started pushing things to no avail. Anyone watching must have though I looked like a crazy person poking my phone and yelling hello over and over again.

By accident I drew my finger across the button and saw that it started making the answer circle get bigger. This was progress. I hurried to make the circle as big I could like some strange katamari. Thank the Samsung Gods it worked! I managed to fumble my way into answering my phone before the person on the other end of the line hung up.
Thus ended my spectacular adventure in answering my phone.

Filed under Nerdy Kitten Pants android phone fail

44,723 notes

facts-i-just-made-up:

metalheadadam:

facts-i-just-made-up:

metalheadadam:

facts-i-just-made-up:

metalheadadam:

facts-i-just-made-up:

A mother helicopter tends to her newborn.

I wish you’d do some research before just spouting out any old crap. If you took two seconds just to LOOK at the picture, you’d see that it’s not a mother and her newborn. You can tell from the size and position of the rotors that it’s actually a hunting male. Also it’s a commonly known fact that whilst all helicopters are born with red tails, this fades to white in males, by the time they’ve reached adulthood. In females, the red has changed to a deep brown.
So this isn’t a lovely picture of caring parenting - in fact, this young ‘copter’s mother is probably dead, herself. There would be no way she’d leave her baby by itself at such a young age. The poor thing likely died mere moments after this picture was taken.
Have some respect.

You ignorant fool.The common Red Tailed Boeing you’re basing your analysis on is endemic to Saudi Arabia, which has no climate zones even remotely resembling that in the picture. Helicopters being short range vehicles, there’s no way a Red Tail could be present in the picture above.What you’re seeing is the red tailed variety of the Arboreal Russian UTair, which you’d know if you so much as looked at the distinctive markings on the parent’s flank.The photo is a mother tending to her newborn as I stated, and you Sir have defamed the endangered helicopter with your inept observations. People like you who think Helicopters are dangerous hunting animals are why these noble beasts have been scrapped to near extinction. Arguments like yours are used to support the helicopter “blading” industry, in which millions of helicopters every year are deprived of their rotor blades and left to die of oil loss or starvation.Support your local anti-blading protest group, and don’t listen to people like metalheadadam, if that’s even your real tumblr url.

No,it is you who are the fool here. You say it’s an arboreal helicopter, but no Russian Utair has ever been spotted out in the open in a tarmac environment before, and I think if this was the first photograph showing one, there’d have been some fanfare about it in National Helo-graphic.
I believe that what we can see here is the Lesser-Spotted Longbow, which, as has been very well-documented, has adapted itself superbly to urban life, and has also been known to disguise itself as other types of helicopter, in order to better stalk its prey. If you look at the smugness of the nose, you’ll see I’m right. Yes, the UTair is a peaceful contraption, but the LSL is a rapacious fiend, and should be removed from the world’s airspace completely.

You’re ignoring the clear signs here but the more important issue is your sickening disregard and characterization of the LSL as a “rapacious fiend.”The LSL is a critical part of the airspace ecosystem. If there were no LSLs, then Piasecki H-21s would quickly grow out of control and soon the air would be downright cluttered with them. Do you want to live in a world where Piasecki noise sounds through the night at deafening levels? Where they land on the streets as you drive and on schoolyards where your children play?Lesser-Spotted Longbows may seem dangerous but the fact is they kill less than five people a year across the globe. Piaseckis kill 80! And they crap all over the windshields of all those unfortunate enough to drive beneath them. Even still, we should not cull Piaseckis as some suggest, their meat is inferior and no significant research is to be done on their flesh. You’re operating from an old world point of view here, one that says mankind has the right, nay the duty to hunt and tame helicopters.But the truth is, helicopters are our neighbors on this planet and they have every bit as much a right to it as we do. Support prohibition of industrial helicopter use, police helicopters and circus helicopters. Don’t eat helicopter meat. And donate generously to PETH, People for the Ethical Treatment of Helicopters.

Listen, PETH claim to be in support of helicopter freedom, but if you look at the statistics, you’ll see that is, in fact, a gigantic lie. People brought 652 sick helicopters into PETH’s “Care Hangars” last year, where PETH claim to repair and repaint them, and find them new owners. Of those 652, PETH dismantled and recycled 635 of them within one day, without even trying to find new owners for them.
You say we should support the prohibition of circus and police helicopters, but without the industries that have grown up around the many useful ways helicopters benefit our society, there would be many more wild helicopters, like the Piaseckis, in our skies, or roosting on the roofs of our homes and schools.
But that’s getting off topic. The LSL is still a menace, and although it helps to control the Piasecki population, there are other, more efficient ways to do that, without relying on the crudeness of nature.
Opening up factories to make clothes from helo skins, for example. Faux-helo has been all the rage on the catwalks for the last three years, and the designers have stated that they’d “love to get [their] hands on the real thing”. Paul McTarnabag said that “without the limitations of artificial fibres, [he] could create the most wonderful coats you’d ever see”.
Let’s be honest, here. Yes, it may involve some violent, painful deaths for certain, more… annoying breeds, but helicopters are basically vermin. Let’s make use of them.

"The crudeness of nature"You lost me there. Nature is a perfect system where helicopters are concerned. It’s only humanity that throws the system out of balance. Before we came along, helicopters existed in equilibrium. As seen in the opening of Disney’s “The Concorde King,” there’s a circle of life. Concordes and SR-71s prey upon the big 747s and Airbuses. Those in turn eat the Cessnas and puddle-hoppers, which feed on smaller helicopters and gyrocopters. When the Concordes die, they become fossil fuels which become jet fuels and which fuel the gyrocopters. But when mankind tinkers with the system, it all goes haywire. A few rivet coats and meals of spicy Apache or Black Hawk aren’t worth it. And that’s not to mention the cruelty of foods like Chinook Gras, in which the noble aircraft are force-fueled to the point of illness so their filters can be harvested. Humankind needs to get out of the chopper business for good and focus on renewable sources of 3D printed parts and vegan alternatives, like Balloons, Zeppelins and Blimps. Human stomachs aren’t meant for heavier-than-air travel, as turbulence can convince anyone. Only lighter than air craft are meant for our fragile systems.This is all a moot point for me as I don’t fly at all. I prefer a more natural means of transport- The whip driven dog-sled.

I can’t love this more. i just can’t.

facts-i-just-made-up:

metalheadadam:

facts-i-just-made-up:

metalheadadam:

facts-i-just-made-up:

metalheadadam:

facts-i-just-made-up:

A mother helicopter tends to her newborn.


I wish you’d do some research before just spouting out any old crap. If you took two seconds just to LOOK at the picture, you’d see that it’s not a mother and her newborn. You can tell from the size and position of the rotors that it’s actually a hunting male. Also it’s a commonly known fact that whilst all helicopters are born with red tails, this fades to white in males, by the time they’ve reached adulthood. In females, the red has changed to a deep brown.

So this isn’t a lovely picture of caring parenting - in fact, this young ‘copter’s mother is probably dead, herself. There would be no way she’d leave her baby by itself at such a young age. The poor thing likely died mere moments after this picture was taken.

Have some respect.

You ignorant fool.

The common Red Tailed Boeing you’re basing your analysis on is endemic to Saudi Arabia, which has no climate zones even remotely resembling that in the picture. Helicopters being short range vehicles, there’s no way a Red Tail could be present in the picture above.

What you’re seeing is the red tailed variety of the Arboreal Russian UTair, which you’d know if you so much as looked at the distinctive markings on the parent’s flank.

The photo is a mother tending to her newborn as I stated, and you Sir have defamed the endangered helicopter with your inept observations. People like you who think Helicopters are dangerous hunting animals are why these noble beasts have been scrapped to near extinction. Arguments like yours are used to support the helicopter “blading” industry, in which millions of helicopters every year are deprived of their rotor blades and left to die of oil loss or starvation.

Support your local anti-blading protest group, and don’t listen to people like metalheadadam, if that’s even your real tumblr url.

No,it is you who are the fool here. You say it’s an arboreal helicopter, but no Russian Utair has ever been spotted out in the open in a tarmac environment before, and I think if this was the first photograph showing one, there’d have been some fanfare about it in National Helo-graphic.

I believe that what we can see here is the Lesser-Spotted Longbow, which, as has been very well-documented, has adapted itself superbly to urban life, and has also been known to disguise itself as other types of helicopter, in order to better stalk its prey. If you look at the smugness of the nose, you’ll see I’m right. Yes, the UTair is a peaceful contraption, but the LSL is a rapacious fiend, and should be removed from the world’s airspace completely.

You’re ignoring the clear signs here but the more important issue is your sickening disregard and characterization of the LSL as a “rapacious fiend.”

The LSL is a critical part of the airspace ecosystem. If there were no LSLs, then Piasecki H-21s would quickly grow out of control and soon the air would be downright cluttered with them. Do you want to live in a world where Piasecki noise sounds through the night at deafening levels? Where they land on the streets as you drive and on schoolyards where your children play?

Lesser-Spotted Longbows may seem dangerous but the fact is they kill less than five people a year across the globe. Piaseckis kill 80! And they crap all over the windshields of all those unfortunate enough to drive beneath them. Even still, we should not cull Piaseckis as some suggest, their meat is inferior and no significant research is to be done on their flesh. You’re operating from an old world point of view here, one that says mankind has the right, nay the duty to hunt and tame helicopters.

But the truth is, helicopters are our neighbors on this planet and they have every bit as much a right to it as we do. Support prohibition of industrial helicopter use, police helicopters and circus helicopters. Don’t eat helicopter meat. And donate generously to PETH, People for the Ethical Treatment of Helicopters.

Listen, PETH claim to be in support of helicopter freedom, but if you look at the statistics, you’ll see that is, in fact, a gigantic lie. People brought 652 sick helicopters into PETH’s “Care Hangars” last year, where PETH claim to repair and repaint them, and find them new owners. Of those 652, PETH dismantled and recycled 635 of them within one day, without even trying to find new owners for them.

You say we should support the prohibition of circus and police helicopters, but without the industries that have grown up around the many useful ways helicopters benefit our society, there would be many more wild helicopters, like the Piaseckis, in our skies, or roosting on the roofs of our homes and schools.

But that’s getting off topic. The LSL is still a menace, and although it helps to control the Piasecki population, there are other, more efficient ways to do that, without relying on the crudeness of nature.

Opening up factories to make clothes from helo skins, for example. Faux-helo has been all the rage on the catwalks for the last three years, and the designers have stated that they’d “love to get [their] hands on the real thing”. Paul McTarnabag said that “without the limitations of artificial fibres, [he] could create the most wonderful coats you’d ever see”.

Let’s be honest, here. Yes, it may involve some violent, painful deaths for certain, more… annoying breeds, but helicopters are basically vermin. Let’s make use of them.

"The crudeness of nature"

You lost me there. Nature is a perfect system where helicopters are concerned. It’s only humanity that throws the system out of balance. Before we came along, helicopters existed in equilibrium.

As seen in the opening of Disney’s “The Concorde King,” there’s a circle of life. Concordes and SR-71s prey upon the big 747s and Airbuses. Those in turn eat the Cessnas and puddle-hoppers, which feed on smaller helicopters and gyrocopters. When the Concordes die, they become fossil fuels which become jet fuels and which fuel the gyrocopters.

But when mankind tinkers with the system, it all goes haywire. A few rivet coats and meals of spicy Apache or Black Hawk aren’t worth it. And that’s not to mention the cruelty of foods like Chinook Gras, in which the noble aircraft are force-fueled to the point of illness so their filters can be harvested. Humankind needs to get out of the chopper business for good and focus on renewable sources of 3D printed parts and vegan alternatives, like Balloons, Zeppelins and Blimps. Human stomachs aren’t meant for heavier-than-air travel, as turbulence can convince anyone. Only lighter than air craft are meant for our fragile systems.

This is all a moot point for me as I don’t fly at all. I prefer a more natural means of transport- The whip driven dog-sled.

I can’t love this more. i just can’t.

(Source: raphaelgranas, via fireun)

Filed under Nerdy Kitten Pants helicopters funny

26 notes

BEA vs Book Con

I have been attending Book Expo America for the pas few years. Each one has been a delight of authors and free books, but this year’s BEA had a new twist: BookCon. I am saddened to have to say this, but I think BookCon may ruin BEA.

I overheard someone talking the numbers. Last year BEA had around 2,000 attendees. This year BookCon brought it up to 8,000. While that might be good for the convention and enticing autors to come to the show, the problem is they cut the show floor in half for the last day to corral the BookCon people to one side. That means that all those 6,000 extra people were shoved into a much smaller space. Things like autographing lines suddenly became autographing battlefields. Organizers were threatening attendees with being ejected from the con if they didn’t clear paths for people to walk as they were a giant fire hazard. Of course they wouldn’t let people line up early because there was NO ROOM. Most of the new fans were teenagers and more than once I overheard them say they were willing to shove people out of the way to get to the author they wanted.The attitude between the BookConners and the BEAers became a bit hostile.

Many of the professionals I spoke with voiced disappointment to anger over the inclusion of so many non-professionals. You can see from some of the pictures above my point. The first picture of the show floor shows an aisle where people can leisurely walk, talk with dealers, and see everything pretty easily. The next 2 pics of the show floor are from BookCon before it started to get really bad. there were times where I became trapped in the crowd as I was trying to get from one end of a booth to another. My friend and I wanted to see Libba Bray and I swear the rabid nature of the crowd as they swarmed the autographing line scared us off. While BookCon seemed like an overflowing anthill of pushy fans the BEA side was a ghost town. I think everything could have been better handled by less tickets sold, better line management, and perhaps having authors do 2 signings: 1 on BookCon side and 1 on BEA side, so that the two groups could stay separate and perhaps not crowd up.

All that said there are still unfortunate people on the BEA side as well. One woman, during the Neil Patrick Harris line used her friend in a wheelchair to push her way into the front of the line, shoved my friend out of the way so she could take pictures, and stole another woman’s book to get signed. Such awfulness is not the norm, but sadly an occasional part of going to BEA. I don’t want to be all negative. BEA is a wonderful time when things go right. The authors are always so wonderful and appreciative of their fans and the books you end up taking home can feed your reading addiction for a year.

If you do decide to go next year just keep in mind your manners and sharpen your elbows.

Filed under Nerdy Kitten Pants book expo america BookCon new york nyc books neil patrick harris amanda palmer mario batali jane lynch

1 note

Adorable toy car might be your new ride.

Google has officially announced their self-driving car. While it may look like an adult version of the Little Tykes car, this auto-automobile has a lot of long reaching questions. If we don’t have to worry about driving then problems of drunk drivers, long commutes, and texting may not be an issue anymore.

As the luxury or not having to drive comes about we also have the issue of professional drivers being unemployed. Could apps such as Hailo (a taxi hailing app) be created to interact with the car? Could going on a cross country trip suddenly become as easy as using Seamless to order takeout? It will be interesting to see how the government and auto insurance companies handle this new technology.

I, personally, am a little nervous about any motor vehicle with no steering wheel or brakes, but the possibilities are exciting.

Filed under Nerdy Kitten Pants google car self driving tech